The end of the semester is always fruitful

Student sends me this e-mail over the weekend:

"I was wondering if you could tell me what grades I received on the paper and journal article review."

Um, the student didn't turn in either of these assignments. I just really wonder what's going through her head before/during/after sending that e-mail. Did she honestly forget that she didn't turn those in? Or is she really thinking that sending that e-mail will imply that she turned in the assignments and it's my error that I don't have them in my possession? Given that she was absent on the day the latter assignment was due, I'm not sure her trickery would get very far with me.

That's easy!

I just got back to my office and I had a message from a student. The student was telling me that she wouldn't be in class later this afternoon and asked if I could send her an e-mail "with any important information that we cover in class."

Just what exactly would be the content of that e-mail?

Who's surprised?

So I met the lazy e-mailers in class today, and who's surprised that one of the two offenders walked into class 10 minutes late? Mark my words: this student is not getting higher than a C.

On the other hand, the student was wearing a Cubs shirt so maybe he's not that dumb afterall...