I wish more students wrote answers like this

On an exam, I asked students to "Name one way to end synaptic transmission." Basically, neurons communicate by releasing neurotransmitters into synapses. I'm asking students for one of the ways this communication ends.

A student answered, "Disconnect the head from the body."

Yeah, that would do it. Too bad they don't get points for amusing answers.

Who's surprised?

So I met the lazy e-mailers in class today, and who's surprised that one of the two offenders walked into class 10 minutes late? Mark my words: this student is not getting higher than a C.

On the other hand, the student was wearing a Cubs shirt so maybe he's not that dumb afterall...

More pre-semester e-mail.

I just received another e-mail from a student:

"I will be in your class this fall.? If you could, I wouldlike to find out the ISBN of the book I need to purchase.? Thank you so much."

Once again, don't you love how they assume I can read their minds about which class they'll be taking... as if I only teach one class or I readily know the names of the students in each class three weeks before any of my classes have met.

What I also like about this e-mail is the request for me to do her work. GO TO THE BOOKSTORE. (And that's essentially what I told her.)

And school hasn't even started yet.

I received this e-mail from a student yesterday:

"Hi. Im in your Psychology class fo this upcoming schoolyear and I need to know the books I need to buy for your class. Can you please e-mail me back with this information?"

First, find the apostrophe on your cell phone.

Second, um, every student needs to know the books he/she needs for the upcoming semester. There's this fancy thing called a 'bookstore' on campus just for that.

Third, I teach four psychology classes next semester. "Your psychology class" is not helpful.

I do not predict a successful semester for this student. I'll try to remember at the end of the semester to post this student's grade.

Student evaluations never let me down.

I was reading through my students' written evaluations from the spring semester and came across a gem from a student in my Intro Psych class. In response to the question that asked the students to list any suggestions they had for improving the class, this student responded, "I wish she wouldn't grade the class like we were psychology majors."

First, it's a psychology class. So, it's just amusing that, on the surface, it sounds like the student is asking me not to grade a psychology class as a psychology class.

Second, and more important, I don't grade the class like they're psychology majors because I don't even know what that means. I grade the class like they're college students taking a college class.

Beyond initial amusement and the amusement from sharing the story with others, it's disturbing to a professor to read a statement like that. Not only does this sadly reflect a general trend towards entitlement and cutting corners, but this reminds me that other majors at my school are grading their students differently. When the modal grade of certain majors at your school is an 'A,' there's a problem. Let me assure you that I teach at a school where most of the students do not have the ability or put in the effort to receive As, if an 'A' means what I want it to mean. Therefore, the grade inflation in these other majors must be outrageous. No wonder my students come into my class and do not want to be graded by my "psychology" standards. The I-actually-have-to-come-to-class-and-read-the-book-and-study-for-exams-and-take-care-in-the-work-I-submit is just so unfair.

Love is...

...your husband voting 1,277 times for your favorite American Idol (David A, obviously).

The Scarlet Letter